Why we Fail at Goals (And how to Fix it) - Catchup With Coach M - Edition 34 -
- Active Living Active Living
- Mar 30
- 6 min read
This Week’s Edition
🚀 Why We Fail at Goals (and How to Fix It)
Struggling to stay on track? Let’s break down the biggest reasons we fall short—and the strategies to turn it around.
📖 Training Diary: The Naked Truth
A raw, unfiltered look at the highs and lows of training. No filters, just real talk.
🔥 2025 HARD Challenge
April Plans Revealed and The Habit Stacking strategy continues.
💡 Personal Development Growth isn’t optional—it’s essential. What happens when you don't apply what you've learned.
Stick Around - Let’s level up together! 💪✨
🚀 Why We Fail at Goals (and How to Fix It)
Goals are a funny thing. We set them with the best intentions, believing they will push us toward a better version of ourselves. But too often, we fail—not because we aren’t capable, but because of how we define and measure success.
Society has conditioned us to believe that goals need to be big, impressive, and externally validated. Simply wanting to be strong, healthy, or happy often doesn’t feel like enough.
Instead, we chase goals that look good on paper or sound impressive to others. We aim for drastic weight loss, marathon finishes, six-figure salaries, or picture-perfect lives. But are these goals truly ours? Or are they shaped by what we think we should achieve?
The Problems With Goal-Setting
1. We Set Goals for Others, Not Ourselves
Many of us set goals based on external validation rather than internal fulfilment.
We want to prove something—to family, friends, or even strangers on social media. But when a goal isn’t deeply personal, motivation fades, and failure feels inevitable.
2. We Focus on the Outcome, Not the Process
A goal like “I want to lose 10kg” or “I want to run a marathon” focuses solely on the end result.
But what about the daily habits, the struggles, the small wins?
When we only fixate on the finish line, setbacks feel like failures instead of part of the journey.
3. We Think Bigger is Always Better
There’s an obsession with extreme transformations—overnight success, 90-day challenges, quick fixes.
But sustainable progress comes from small, consistent efforts over time. A goal doesn’t have to be massive to be meaningful.
4. We Underestimate the Mental Game
Achieving any goal requires discipline, patience, and resilience. But many of us don’t prepare for the mental barriers—self-doubt, fear of failure, or losing motivation. We expect smooth progress, and when things get tough, we quit.
How to Actually Achieve Your Goals
Instead of setting goals that are flashy or extreme, focus on what truly matters to you. Here’s how:
1. Define Your “Why”
Ask yourself: Why do I want this?
If your goal doesn’t have a strong personal reason behind it, it’s easy to abandon. Dig deep—what does achieving this goal actually mean for your life?
2. Shift from Outcome based to Progress Process Goals
Instead of saying, “I want to run a marathon,” shift your focus to “I will run 3 times a week and build my endurance.” Process goals keep you moving forward, even when progress feels slow.
3. Set Goals That Feel Good to YOU
Forget what looks impressive to others. If your goal is to move your body daily because it makes you feel good, that’s valid.
If you want to improve your nutrition for energy, not weight loss, that’s valid too. Your goals should align with your values—not society’s expectations.
4. Set you Non Negotiables
When it comes to achieving any goal—whether it's fitness, personal growth, or career success—consistency is everything.
That’s where non-negotiables come in.
Each week, I set my minimum requirements—the absolute must-dos that keep me on track. No excuses, no skipping. These are the foundation of progress.
By committing to these essentials, I ensure steady progress, even when life gets busy. Because success isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up, week after week.
What are your non-negotiables? Define them, commit to them, and watch the results follow!
5. Embrace the Struggles as Part of the Journey
Failure, setbacks, and slow progress are inevitable.
Instead of seeing them as reasons to quit, reframe them as lessons. Success isn’t about never failing—it’s about getting back up, again and again.
The Bottom Line
We fail at goals not because we lack discipline or motivation, but because we set them for the wrong reasons. True success comes when we stop chasing what looks good to others and start focusing on what feels meaningful to us. Your goals don’t have to be big or impressive—they just have to be yours.
Training Calendar: The Highs, The Lows & Everything In Between! 📆💪
When I started this blog, I promised to share an honest reflection of my training—no sugar coating, no highlight reels, just the real experience.
So here it is: the last two weeks have been anything but ideal. its Been mentally hard and physically tough.
It hasn’t been the perfect training block. There were days when motivation was low, when life got in the way, and when workouts didn’t go as planned. But despite that, I’ve still managed to hold onto a few key wins, BECAUSE MY WHY is CLEAR TO ME! and that’s what matters.
I am not going to go into my WHY's and exactly what they mean to me but lets celebrate The Wins (Because They Matter!)
Even when training didn’t feel perfect, I stuck to my non-negotiables:
✔ Daily movement – Even if it wasn’t the ideal session, I did something every day to keep the habit alive.
✔ Weekly Step Goal – I have a weekly Step Goal of 70 000 steps, walk run or crawl - that was achieved.
✔ Honouring my race commitments – Even when I know a race might be slower than I’d like, I’m still showing up (within reason, of course—no reckless half marathons without training because that’s an injury waiting to happen).
✔ Consistent strength training – Because running alone isn’t enough. Strength work is what keeps me injury-free and helps me improve.
These small wins might not seem huge, but they are the foundation of progress.
The Reality: Life Happens - What happens then...
Like everyone, I have responsibilities, unexpected obstacles, and days when things don’t go to plan. And when that happens, it’s easy to let frustration take over. Goals, as I talked about in my last post, can sometimes feel like a blur—we get so caught up in the end result that we forget the importance of the journey.
The journey of improvement isn’t about being perfect. It’s about learning how to adapt.
✔ It’s about fitting in a run when you almost convinced yourself you didn’t have time.
✔ It’s about getting through a training session even when your mind is screaming at you to quit.
✔ It’s about building resilience—mentally and physically.
Some days, training will feel effortless. Other days, it will feel like an uphill battle. But what matters isn’t whether every session is perfect—it’s whether you keep showing up.
If you’re in a rough patch with your training, know this: consistency matters more than perfection. Progress isn’t measured by flawless weeks but by the ability to keep moving forward, even when things aren’t ideal.
So here’s my honest truth—these last two weeks weren’t great, but they also weren’t a failure. Because I’m still here, still training, still committed, STILL hit ticked my basic boxes.
At the end of the day, that’s what truly counts.
For those following along - here is the sessions that happened.
Step Goal Achieved
Week Goal Achieved - Daily Movement with 3 strength sessions
The 2025 HARD Challenge: Pushing Through & Stacking Habits 💪🔥
Like I mentioned a few weeks ago, the 2025 HARD Challenge is exactly that—HARD. March wasn’t perfect, but I stayed on track 80% of the time, and that’s a win in my book!
Since this is a habit-stacking challenge, I’ve decided to extend my March focus into April.
Why? Because here in South Africa, April is packed with long weekends and holidays—historically, a tough time for me to stay consistent with my nutrition goals. Instead of letting that throw me off, I’m doubling down and staying committed.
For those just joining:
✅ January: No sugar challenge → Now aiming for less sugar throughout the year.
✅ February: 70 minutes per week dedicated to learning a new skill → Still going strong!
✅ March: Refocusing on nutrition → Now rolling into April for extra reinforcement.
The journey isn’t about perfection—it’s about consistency and adaptation. Let’s keep stacking those habits and pushing forward! Who’s in? 💪🔥
Personal Development - The Power of Planning: A Lesson Learned (the Hard Way!)
A few weeks ago, I shared a Mel Robbins podcast (Click to listen) about getting your week organized. I gave it a shot, stuck with it for about three weeks, and honestly—it made a huge difference. Then… life happened, and I fell off the wagon - no excuses life happened.
Let me tell you—my weeks definitely noticed. 😅 Without a proper plan, everything felt unorganized, tasks piled up, and I didn’t get nearly as much done. The result? More stress, more chaos, and a strong reminder that planning isn’t just helpful—it’s essential.
So, lesson learned. Time to get back on track! Have you ever experienced this? What’s your go-to strategy for staying organized?
That’s a Wrap for This Week!
Thanks for reading another edition of my blog—I appreciate you being here! Wishing you a brilliant week ahead filled with progress, positivity, and purpose.
See you next time! ✨💪
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